The Tourist.

It would be nice to have safe goals.  Goals that make sense and are readily achievable.  My goals will surely be my ruin because they are things I long for so much but are so risky and have such an overwhelming rate of failure. Professional music is an example.

 

Goals like that are all or nothing.  You make it, you make a name out of something, you sell some records, you have some good tours and maybe half a decade of success.  Then you’re done.  Now what’s the plan?  This is why my goals are unsafe and irresponsible.  Maybe I will grow up and be regular, with job interviews and health insurance and mortgage payments on a house that’s my own.  That would be okay.

 

That’s not the goal though.  I want it all.  I want to make enough money doing what I love so I don’t have to do something else as well.  Part time musicians want to be full time musicians.  Part time musicians with full time day jobs want to be full time musicians.  I love my day job, but I wouldn’t shed a tear to leave it if Capitol records knocked on my door.  Who would?

 

So that’s the story.  It’s a classic story.  Lots of people have that story.  That’s okay.  It’s a good story.

Winter Albums Are For You.

Every year I get locked in a groove of winter music.  Not Christmas music, that has it’s place, but “Winter” music.  Songs that make me think of walking under frosty trees in the oval (pictured above) coming home from class, or driving in a warm car as the world around me claws the hard-packed snowy road for traction.  Songs of joy or songs of contemplation.  Albums that seamlessly convey hopeful or thoughtful themes.  Winter music.  A wonderful part of the season.  So here’s my list of winter albums your season will be incomplete without, in no particular order:

• “Into the Blue Again” by The Album Leaf
• “As Tall As Lions” by As Tall As Lions
• “3 Rounds and a Sound” by Blind Pilot
• “Letters” by Butch Walker
• “Brothers and Sisters” by Coldplay (specifically the song “Easy to Please”, probably my all-time favorite Coldplay song)
• “Eat, Sleep, Repeat” by Copeland
• “You Are My Sunshine” by Copeland (a new addition to the list)
• “O” by Damien Rice
• “The Photo Album” by Death Cab For Cutie
• “The Last Broadcast” by Doves
• “Marvelous Things” by Eisley (no longer on iTunes apparently)
• “Fleet Foxes” by Fleet Foxes
• “Now That I’ve Found You” by Alsion Krauss
• “The Moon Is Down” by Further Seems Forever
• “The Eleventh Hour” by Jars Of Clay
• “Winter” by Jon Foreman (crazy, right?)
• “Catch For Us The Foxes” by mewithoutYou (actually perfect for all seasons)
• “Come Away With Me” by Norah Jones
• “Distorted Lullabies” by Ours (best blizzard driving music)
• “( )” by  Sigur Ros (life changing record)
• “The Eraser” by Thom Yorke of Radiohead
• “Set Yourself on Fire” by Stars
• “Sky Blue Sky” by Wilco

I guess that order turned out kind of alphabetical.  Don’t be overwhelmed if you don’t own every album listed above.  But definitely talk to me if you want a few of them, I would LOVE to hook you up.  A great place to start is “Eat, Sleep, Repeat” by Copeland.  If you don’t have that album don’t go any further till you do.  Amazing music.  Some of my favorite.

 

Seasons have a sound.  Summer sounds like Bleach.  Fall sounds like Augustana.  Spring sounds like old Mae.  But Winter cannot be named in a single band no matter how hard you try.  That’s what I think.

 

What are your favorite winter albums? Comment and tell me!

How To Disappear Completely.

Today my roomate and I returned to a head shop we had visited last week.  This head shop has a pretty decent vinyl collection, and today was the day they said they would have a bunch of Radiohead vinyls in.  I purchased Kid A, my favorite Radiohead album, and Phil bought In Rainbows, his favorite. All day we’ve been enjoying the clever, warm sound of Radiohead on vinyl. 

On a different note, tonight Campus Crusade moved into our new venue (Johnson Hall Rm. 222 if you care to know) after outgrowing the last one.  It was one of the best meetings in Cru history.  We have a great new sound guy named Steve, who has made things so much easier for us, so the music sounded pretty good I thought.  There were probably 350 kids tonight, which is a lot for any school club, not to mention an evangelical Christian club.  Tonight I tried a new snare drum tuning ala Jared Henderson from Newlife.  I installed a gigantic 42-strand snarebed and bought super thin 1-ply heads.  I was so excited, but it turns out I don’t know how to make that kind of a setup sound good.  It was real chainy and loud, but too muffled   I switched snare drums for the second set and things sounded better.

And my song will be I love You…

Tonight I was watching the olympics at my friends Dru and Chris’ house.  Sean Johnson had just been awarded the gold medal in gymnastics at age 16 and was holding back tears of joy.  An interview came a bit later, in which her trainer talked about how when she came to his gym in West Des Moines, Iowa at age 6, he asked her “How good do you want to be?”  Ten years later her answer to him had become a reality as she stood on the podium with a gold medal around her neck, hearing the Star Spangled Banner play over the sound system in a gigantic Olympic gym in communist China.  

 

Playing electric guitar came into my mind, like it tends to, and I thought to myself. “If at her age she had  developed to be as good as she set out to be, through intense training and dedication, I also can be as good as I want to if I do the same.” Of course I didn’t SAY those words to myself, but that was the thought process.  So here’s the truth.  Let me get it out there.  I want to be a really good guitar player.  Like Johnny Greenwood good.  Like Omar Rodríguez-López good. Like Michael Guy Chislett good.  Here is why I want to be that good at electric guitar.  Honestly and sincerely I do not want my talent or inability to play to hinder my creativity in worship.  If I hear it in my head and feel it in my soul I want to be able to communicate it through my instrument unhindered.  

 

It’s selfish because I want the satisfaction of being able to seamlessly play the things I hear in my head that I think are great.  It’s selfish because it means a lot to ME how good I am.  It’s honestly not to impress anyone.  No Bull.  I’m not concerned with what you think about my talent or lack thereof.  I need to know that I’m good enough.  It’s selfish because I want to be talented enough to make a living of playing guitar so I don’t have to waste my time doing something else I don’t care about.  I would spend all day at even the best desk job thinking about playing electric guitar.

 

But here’s why it isn’t selfish.  The biggest reason for my wanting to be a fantastic electric guitar player is that I want to communicate my love to the father and I know of no better way to do so, set aside giving my life for his glory.  In my situation, the passion I have in my heart is music.  Not uncommon.  When I try to run from it I get unstable and cranky.  It’s my love.  It’s my outward love to God.  My life’s a lovesong to you.  If I can make a sound that comes from my whole being, if I can make noises and pick the notes that move you, then I am all I need to be as a musician.  If I’m all I need to be as a musician, than I can easier worship with all that I am as a person.  Then it can bless other people, too.  But honestly for nobody else, if I can make sounds that come directly from my love and God is blessed directly, than I have found my portion in life.  My song, my sound will be “I love you.”  I think that sound is crazy and loud.  I think that sound is unbridled and unheard of.  I think it sounds like home.  I think it sounds like hope.  Maybe I am arrogant, but I am not arrogant in this.  Christ is worth my whole life’s efforts.  I would lay it all down and seek after music if it were his will for me.  It may or may not be his will for me, but it burns in my heart every day.  

 

“How good do you want to be?”  I’m a six year old right now in the world of guitar playing, not terribly talented, but being trained in my passion one step at a time.  Ten years from now I want to be standing on a podium receiving the enormous reward of my work.  The biggest reward possible in the world of worship and electric guitar playing.  The reward of chains being broken, lives being healed, eyes being opened, and Christ being revealed on a massive scale wherever the Lord chooses to put me.  If my podium is a stage on a tour, in my little home church , in a studio booth, in a local venue, or in a staduim packed with youth desperate for God, I believe I will see my efforts rewarded.  Because I have said “For my inheritance give me the lost!”  

 

This is why I want to be a really good electric guitar player.  Does that make sense?

I want to wake up as this man.

Jonny Greenwood from Radiohead is a pretty big idol of mine I guess.  Not in an Old Testament kind of idol way, but more like a, how can I be that great at guitar someday way.  I love his ideas, I love his aggression.  I love that he uses an old Mac, with a program called Max/MSP, and does solos like this one.  Definitely watch this.

 

 

So let me know what you think about that.

A few things.

• Chelsea Hartling. My secret crush freshman year. My prom date senior year. Lived in Kansas last year. One of my favorite friends every year. Now a blogger.  She just started her blog and it’s under construction, but welcome her to our world?
  
• Radiohead just put a whole bunch of live videos “From the basement” up on iTunes. It’s $ 8.00 for ten really good videos. Do it.
• Someone offered me $15 dollars for all five of the pedals I have for sale. I suggested $20 for the crappiest of them all and $300 for all five. He offered $15 period. I emailed him to make sure he was serious and he was. I love craigslist.
• Just got a job at Noodles & Company. I was there today for an hour and a half to shadow some people so they could see how I work and interact with customers. They then sat me down, bought me a delicious meal, and offered me a job. I accepted and walked home in two minutes. That’s a hook up for free noodles and not having to drive to work.
• An olde Cameron At Bay song has been in my head all day next to Viva La Vida. Sean whatever happened to that creepy awesome circus song? “Mothers lost their children in the fire..” or something scary and thought provoking. That song is great and we need to record it someday. For now I will just sing what I remember of it to myself.

So that’s today.

I’m at a place of decision making, as usual, and I need some serious prayer. I have everything set up for me here at CSU, but I don’t feel like I know that I’m where God wants me. Not fun. I need him to give me a word or something. I’d love to stick around here, but I’ll leave and go do whatever he wants (Missions, Vegas with Debbie and the Woods, School of Worship, etc…) at the drop of a hat. I would seriously start packing up my car now if he said to. I want to be where I am the most effective. Making Noodles will be fun, but I want to be making disciples and making albums. I just need a word from God. I can do those things here if he wants, but I’m not settled here and it doesn’t feel like home. Pray for your friend JD? Much love.